Five

Jack through the years. Top row: 3rd birthday, two-weeks-old, 2-year-old pictures.

Bottom row: First birthday, fifth birthday, 4-years-old gardening!!

Five is kind of a cool age.

First of all, you're not four.

If someone asks your age, you don't have to waggle or cross any fingers or count. You just hold up your hand with confidence: five fingers, five years.

You can get a library card.

If you follow a regular immunization schedule, you get shots.

Your're old enough for summer soccer in Mount Morris and level 2 swimming lessons in Nunda.

You start kindergarten.

Today, Jack is 5. Five years ago, I entered that unknown land of labor, delivery and parenthood. He was a textbook birth, followed by four months or so of colic. At 1, he would shove a book in my hand and say forcefully, "Read, Mom, read."At 2, he gained a sister, a big-boy bed and let go of his binky. At 3, he planned his birthday party, learned to garden and gained a baby brother. At four, his mind kind of exploded, his curiosity became limitless, he formed his own friendships. It was at four that I really realized for all the creation I did, this boy was not mine.

Certainly, Jack is my son. I made him. But he is his own person on his own little life track. And I am so privileged to be guiding him, cheering him on, hugging him through the hard times, helping him learn to make choices. Poor first-born child. Jack is my test subject, the one who has had to endure all my insanity and learning how to be a Mom. I'm sure his brother and sister appreciate his loving, tolerant nature, because I'm not sure either of them would have endured my craziness like he has. And I am certainly a better mother because of him.

Somehow, he will survive his shots tomorrow (he has been dreading this day for a very long time.) T-minus six months until Jack becomes a school boy. Somehow, I'll survive his move to kindergarten. I will miss him and what a big help he is, but school is kind of the first big step out into the world of becoming your own person. Right now, we are working on reading. He's wanted to learn for a while, so here we are, letter workbooks and phonics and whole words all jumbled into random daily lessons. He is waiting (with waning patience...it's been five days!!) for two books on folding paper airplanes to come in to the library. He is obsessed with legos, particularly little Lego men. It took a lot of effort for me not to put each new Lego set he got for his birthday in a baggie so he could make each different plane or car. Finally, I realized his plan of dumping them into one big bucket and building whatever he wants is not the end of the world. In fact, it's been the beginning of dozens of planes Lego never thought up.

Because that's the great thing about being 5: You're on the cusp of so many of life's great discoveries, from Lego planes to school

I love this kid, my little Jackie, as he calls himself. He is a smart, fun, helpful, happy little boy. His birth five years ago was a dream come true. It made me a mommy. And while that road is certainly not the easy breezy one I'd expected, it has been worth every step. My little Jackie: I can't imagine my life without him in it.